I was listening to the midday show on WEEI (Boston sports talk radio) today with Dale Arnold & Rich Keefe and they were talking about ways for the Celtics to fix their obvious team chemistry issues. One of the ideas Keefe had was a pizza party because no one has ever been upset at a pizza party. Here is my comical take on what a Celtics pizza party would be like and what each participant would be acting like.
(In the order they would be in line to get pizza)
Kyrie Irving - The man who is the main cause of all of the chemistry issues and the reason why we are having a pizza party in the first place. Kyrie would be the one who is just rushing to the front of the line when the pizza showed up and telling everyone that he gets to go first because it’s his party.
Jason Tatum - He would be right behind Kyrie in line but not in any rush to cut him. He knows that soon as Kyrie gets his, this is going to be his team.
Marcus Smart - Marcus would be the one pouring out the soda for everyone since he is second on the team in assists per game this season. He also wouldn’t be shy to shoot everyone’s crumpled up napkins into the trash because we all know that Marcus LOVES to shoot.
Al Horford - Al would just be that average guy towards the middle of the line starring the people down who were taking slices of the kind that he wanted. You know that look he has when times get tough.
Gordon Hayward - He would be the one eating pizza while gaming (the kid who always got the controller all greasy).
Marcus Morris - Morris would be aggressive getting his and if anyone wanted to get in his way, him and his brother would take care of them outside. Oops - too soon?
Aaron Baynes - Baynes would be the guy just asking everyone if they are going to finish their crust and to let him know if they don’t want it because he will eat it.
Daniel Theis - Wearing his scary Terry Barstool shirt and just happy to be there.
Jaylen Brown - towards the back of the line and not in any rush to use his athleticism to get closer towards the front. He could probably leap Baynes and Morris if he wanted to but he’s just a little more cautious now after that horrific spill he took trying to dunk last season.
Brad Wannamaker - Towards the back of the line and just hoping that there will be some left for him when it's his turn.
Robert Williams - At the back of the line because Kyrie made a rule that you only get as many slices as points per game you’re averaging (2.9).
Guerschon Yabusele - He showed up late to the party because he was coming from the barber with his most recent hair style.
Terry Rozier - I feel like Terry would just be chilling on the couch waiting for the line to die down and asking his teammates, “Yo, when will the strippers be here?”
Brad Stevens - serving the pizza to all of the players trying to earn their respect.
Danny Ainge - Following Kyrie around doing and saying whatever he wants so that hopefully he will decide to stay in Boston.
Let’s hope the pizza party can fix the team chemistry, Celts are about to tip off against the Blazers who are currently in 4th place in the Western Conference.